Breaking Down Barriers
I truly love my job. Just like everyone else, I have good days and bad days and aspects of my job that I could do without. But, by and large, I truly enjoy what I do. I can’t tell you how grateful I’m able to say that! Even after 12 years, I still love it. This isn’t from doing the same old thing everyday. I continue to love it through professional growth and pushing the boundaries of what I think I can do as an interior designer and as a working mom.
When I first started out, the scope of most of my jobs consisted of choosing paint colours, floor finishing, furniture layout and possibly some millwork design. I typically worked for male contractors and let them run the jobs. I came to the sites as they needed me, did the running around, drawings and sourcing: all of the typical jobs that any new designer would do. However, as time went on, and my skill set and confidence grew through new experiences and I started to have a thirst for more. Wanting more is one thing, but doing it is a whole other thing. As I’m sure you understand, as a mom of three young kids, these changes and my professional growth have come with their own set of challenges from a professional and personal standpoint.
Born in 1977, I grew up in a time where young girls were told that we could do anything we wanted to do and have it all. Be a working mom, run a business, run the country for that matter, and still run a house, have 2+ kids and be a great wife. This is what I believed as a young girl. Even though I was being told this, as I grew older and more aware, I soon realized that society wasn’t set up for this reality at all. Certain jobs weren’t deemed suitable for women, and even more so for women who chose to have children. The crazy part is, at the beginning I accepted this. In fact, truth be told, I set up my business as a side hustle to help out our family finances and pursue something that I loved. But my number one contribution was still being a mom and a good wife. I listened to all the ‘white noise’ from outside telling me that women aren’t typically successful business owners and hustlers because, as moms, we need to be there for our kids.
While I agree that our kids and families are absolutely our number one priority, but that doesn't mean that we can’t also grow in our professions. It took me years to acknowledge the boundaries that I created in my mind, and began to consciously tell myself that these aren’t actual walls that I couldn’t break through. With a lot of hard work, strength and perseverance, I could overcome anything that lies before me.
I love the construction side of my job. I’ve always loved it. People often think that designers go into this profession because they like picking paint colours and furnishings. Don’t get me wrong. I love the ‘pretty’ stuff, but my favourite component is the construction side. I get so excited watching my plans and drawings come to life on site. Scheduling, working with trades, solving problems and making our clients happy brings so much joy to my job.
Like any woman working in a male dominated industry, there are barriers. Some larger than others. In my own experience, my largest barrier has been my own mind. For years, I told myself that I couldn’t lead a project as a woman and as a mom. I would be better off creating the design plans, but let others implement and hire the trades. I’m a woman. These guys aren’t going to listen to me. Through a lot of positive self talk, hard work and the support of my biggest cheerleader, my husband, I’ve been able to erode these barriers.
What I’ve discovered is that the skill set I’ve acquired from being a mom, coupled with my design experience, is a huge asset on site. Problem solving, thinking on the fly, organizing, nurturing different personalities, teaching and of course being a good listener are all skills that I’ve fine tuned over the last fourteen years of being a mom to three distinctly different children and are a necessity when managing a project. I can’t speak for management on the commercial side, although I hope to one day soon.
I can say that most barriers aren’t too large to break down, especially with a little positive self talk, determination and tremendous support. I may not wear a tool belt, but my ability to implement the plans, problem solve, multi-task, manage schedules, leave me in good stead on the site. I wonder if my mothering way even warms up the site a bit and makes everyone feel more welcomed and respected. I’m not entirely sure that this is the case, but I’d like to think so. Momma’s and ladies out there, let’s continue to break down those barriers and make meaningful changes. We’ve got so much to contribute!